Even Negative Feedback Can Be Valuable

We often wonder what others really think about something we’ve said or done. The only way to find out is to get feedback from them, and it’s not always going to be positive. However, this doesn’t mean it isn’t all valuable. In fact, when someone disagrees with us and tells us why it can be the most valuable feedback we receive.

When someone criticizes us the first thing we usually want to do is to reject the criticism and respond with a justification of whatever it is we’ve said that they’re disagreeing with. This can make for a lively discussion at parties but if both sides just state their piece and don’t really listen to what the other side is saying the value of the feedback will be lost.

There are a couple of very good reasons to listen carefully to feedback, even if it’s critical of your position or saying something you completely oppose. The first reason is that you may learn something you didn’t know before – you might even have got a fact or two wrong.

The second good reason to listen to feedback is that if one person disagrees with you there could easily be others that feel the same way. This gives you a chance to either change your position or get additional information that will support your assertions next time around.

There’s a simple but very effective way to receive feedback, whether positive or negative, and to make sure you obtain the maximum possible value from it.

Listen actively

When someone is giving you feedback you’re probably only half-listening to what they have to say. The other half of your consciousness is formulating responses to what they’re saying, and when this happens you’re missing at least half the value of the feedback you’re getting.

Listening is an art – an active art. You have to work just as hard to listen to someone else as you do to speak to them. Focus on every word and if there’s any doubt about what they’re telling you ask them to clarify what they’ve said. Ask them for examples if it’s helpful to do so. Be sure that you fully understand what they’re saying.

Manage the feedback session

If the other person is angry or hostile do what you can to calm them down first, before probing for their thoughts or feelings. It’s up to you to manage the conversation in such a way that both of you are rational and aiming to discover the truth rather than just repeat what’s already been said.

One way of controlling a negative person who’s also a bit angry is to give them feedback on their position. Even if you just say “Yes, I can understand how you would feel that way” or “I hadn’t thought about that side of it” you’ll be showing respect for their feelings and calming down their hostility.

Another management technique that’s useful in feedback sessions is to repeat every point made by the other person. This helps ensure you fully understand what it is they’re trying to say as well as forcing the discussion into a point-by-point structure instead of just letting it all flow unchecked.

Ask questions to draw them out. One of the best is to ask: “If you were in my position what would you have done?” or something similar to this. It gives them a chance to make a contribution by creating an option to whatever it is that they see as unsatisfactory.

Apologize in the right way

Unless something is raised by the other person that completely changes your mind on the subject chances are you’ll still have some level of disagreement when the feedback session’s over. One good way to end it is with an apology that’s not necessarily an admission that you’ve been wrong.

Some examples of this type of apology are: “I’m sorry if I’ve upset you” and “If only we could have had this conversation before I said that”. It doesn’t mean you’ve accepted that you’re wrong; it does tell the other person that you would prefer not to have upset them with what you said or did.

Be thankful and say it

At the end of the feedback session (or to end the feedback session!) thank the other person for taking the trouble to tell you their feelings. Remember the two reasons for paying close attention to feedback – you might learn something new and you’ll be better prepared for next time.

In the final analysis you may not change anything despite the feedback you’ve received. At least you’ve learned some of the reactions others will have to your position and you’ll be better prepared next time you want to make the same points, and that’s how you can extract the value from negative feedback.

Article courtesy of RAN ONE:

175 replies
  1. Mervin Gillian
    Mervin Gillian says:

    I’m not sure why but this blog is loading incredibly slow for me. Is anyone else having this problem or is it a issue on my end? I’ll check back later on and see if the problem still exists.

  2. zx flux
    zx flux says:

    I’m usually to running a blog and i really admire your content. The article has actually peaks my interest. I am going to bookmark your website and preserve checking for new information.

  3. read review
    read review says:

    I simply want to mention I am just new to blogging and seriously enjoyed this blog site. More than likely I’m likely to bookmark your site . You definitely have amazing well written articles. Bless you for revealing your website page.

  4. yeezy boost 350
    yeezy boost 350 says:

    Oh my goodness! an incredible article dude. Thank you However I am experiencing concern with ur rss . Don抰 know why Unable to subscribe to it. Is there anybody getting identical rss downside? Anyone who is aware of kindly respond. Thnkx

  5. Leonardo Deskin
    Leonardo Deskin says:

    magnificent publish, very informative. I’m wondering why the opposite specialists of this sector don’t realize this. You should proceed your writing. I am sure, you’ve a huge readers’ base already!

  6. golden goose
    golden goose says:

    The following time I read a weblog, I hope that it doesnt disappoint me as much as this one. I mean, I do know it was my option to read, but I really thought youd have one thing interesting to say. All I hear is a bunch of whining about something that you may fix in the event you werent too busy searching for attention.

  7. Tworzenie Gorzow
    Tworzenie Gorzow says:

    obviously like your web-site however you have to check the spelling on quite a few of your posts. Several of them are rife with spelling problems and I in finding it very troublesome to inform the truth then again I’ll surely come back again.

  8. supreme hoodie
    supreme hoodie says:

    I抎 should test with you here. Which is not something I often do! I get pleasure from reading a post that will make individuals think. Additionally, thanks for permitting me to remark!

  9. i99bet
    i99bet says:

    Hello there! I just wish to offer you a huge thumbs up for your excellent information you’ve got right here on this post. I’ll be coming back to your site for more soon.

  10. Tractor Workshop Manuals
    Tractor Workshop Manuals says:

    Awesome blog! Is your theme custom made or did you download it from somewhere? A design like yours with a few simple tweeks would really make my blog shine. Please let me know where you got your design. Thanks a lot

  11. togel online
    togel online says:

    Very nice post. I just stumbled upon your weblog and wanted to say that I’ve truly enjoyed browsing your blog posts. After all I’ll be subscribing to your rss feed and I hope you write again soon!

  12. udaipur escorts
    udaipur escorts says:

    My wife and i felt very joyous that Peter could round up his investigation by way of the ideas he had when using the web page. It is now and again perplexing to just choose to be making a gift of facts that the others have been selling. We really consider we now have you to be grateful to because of that. The type of explanations you’ve made, the easy blog navigation, the friendships you help promote – it’s mostly unbelievable, and it’s really making our son in addition to our family reckon that that idea is interesting, which is certainly particularly important. Many thanks for the whole lot!

  13. nba중계
    nba중계 says:

    You really make it seem so easy together with your presentation but I in finding this matter to be really one thing which I feel I’d by no means understand. It sort of feels too complex and extremely extensive for me. I am taking a look forward to your next publish, I will try to get the hold of it!

  14. Delta installation
    Delta installation says:

    Hello would you mind letting me know which hosting company you’re working with? I’ve loaded your blog in 3 completely different web browsers and I must say this blog loads a lot quicker then most. Can you recommend a good hosting provider at a reasonable price? Cheers, I appreciate it!

  15. UFABET
    UFABET says:

    Your style is unique compared to other people I have read stuff from. I appreciate you for posting when you have the opportunity, Guess I will just bookmark this blog.

  16. Furniture installation
    Furniture installation says:

    Hey! I just wanted to ask if you ever have any trouble with hackers? My last blog (wordpress) was hacked and I ended up losing many months of hard work due to no back up. Do you have any methods to stop hackers?

  17. Furniture assembly help
    Furniture assembly help says:

    Thanks for these guidelines. One thing I also believe is that often credit cards presenting a 0% monthly interest often entice consumers in zero rate, instant authorization and easy online balance transfers, however beware of the main factor that will probably void the 0% easy streets annual percentage rate and also throw anybody out into the terrible house in no time.

  18. dig this
    dig this says:

    of course like your web-site however you have to take a look at the spelling on several of your posts. Several of them are rife with spelling issues and I find it very troublesome to inform the reality however I will definitely come again again.

  19. i99BET
    i99BET says:

    I’m amazed, I must say. Rarely do I encounter a blog that’s both educative and amusing, and without a doubt, you’ve hit the nail on the head. The problem is an issue that too few people are speaking intelligently about. I’m very happy I came across this during my search for something regarding this.

  20. house cleaning Las Vegas
    house cleaning Las Vegas says:

    Does your site have a contact page? I’m having problems locating it but, I’d like to shoot you an e-mail. I’ve got some creative ideas for your blog you might be interested in hearing. Either way, great blog and I look forward to seeing it improve over time.

  21. house cleaning Las Vegas
    house cleaning Las Vegas says:

    It’s a pity you don’t have a donate button! I’d definitely donate to this outstanding blog! I suppose for now i’ll settle for bookmarking and adding your RSS feed to my Google account. I look forward to fresh updates and will talk about this website with my Facebook group. Chat soon!

  22. เกมส์ ไฮโล ออนไลน์
    เกมส์ ไฮโล ออนไลน์ says:

    Thanks for sharing superb informations. Your web site is very cool. I’m impressed by the details that you have on this site. It reveals how nicely you understand this subject. Bookmarked this website page, will come back for extra articles. You, my friend, ROCK! I found just the info I already searched all over the place and simply couldn’t come across. What an ideal web site.

  23. Package
    Package says:

    Hi, i think that i saw you visited my web site thus i came to “return the favor”.I am trying to find things to enhance my website!I suppose its ok to use a few of your ideas!!

  24. dresser assembly service
    dresser assembly service says:

    I have to get across my respect for your kindness supporting men and women that have the need for assistance with this particular topic. Your personal dedication to passing the message all around was rather insightful and has regularly encouraged associates much like me to attain their objectives. The useful guide can mean much a person like me and far more to my colleagues. Many thanks; from all of us.

  25. Skincare
    Skincare says:

    I do believe all of the ideas you have offered on your post. They are very convincing and can certainly work. Nonetheless, the posts are too quick for newbies. May just you please extend them a bit from subsequent time? Thank you for the post.

  26. Women Robes
    Women Robes says:

    It’s actually a cool and useful piece of information. I am satisfied that you shared this helpful info with us. Please keep us informed like this. Thank you for sharing.

  27. Hardcore Porn
    Hardcore Porn says:

    Thanks for giving your ideas here. The other factor is that any time a problem appears with a laptop motherboard, people should not have some risk regarding repairing it themselves for if it is not done right it can lead to permanent damage to the full laptop. In most cases, it is safe to approach your dealer of a laptop for any repair of its motherboard. They have got technicians who definitely have an know-how in dealing with laptop computer motherboard troubles and can carry out the right diagnosis and carry out repairs.

  28. Furniture assembly help
    Furniture assembly help says:

    What i do not understood is in reality how you’re now not actually a lot more smartly-preferred than you might be now. You are so intelligent. You recognize therefore considerably on the subject of this topic, produced me in my opinion consider it from so many various angles. Its like men and women don’t seem to be involved except it is one thing to accomplish with Woman gaga! Your own stuffs excellent. All the time take care of it up!

  29. Furniture assembly help
    Furniture assembly help says:

    Thanks , I’ve recently been looking for information about this subject for a while and yours is the greatest I have found out so far. But, what concerning the conclusion? Are you positive in regards to the source?

  30. Pool table assembly
    Pool table assembly says:

    That is really attention-grabbing, You’re an overly skilled blogger. I have joined your rss feed and look forward to searching for more of your wonderful post. Additionally, I’ve shared your website in my social networks!

  31. doorwin group windows
    doorwin group windows says:

    One other important area is that if you are an older person, travel insurance with regard to pensioners is something you should really consider. The older you are, greater at risk you will be for having something poor happen to you while in most foreign countries. If you are definitely not covered by a number of comprehensive insurance coverage, you could have several serious difficulties. Thanks for expressing your suggestions on this weblog.

  32. doorwin windows
    doorwin windows says:

    Thanks for your handy post. In recent times, I have come to understand that the symptoms of mesothelioma cancer are caused by the build up connected fluid regarding the lining on the lung and the breasts cavity. The illness may start inside chest region and propagate to other body parts. Other symptoms of pleural mesothelioma cancer include fat loss, severe inhaling and exhaling trouble, temperature, difficulty taking in food, and bloating of the face and neck areas. It should be noted that some people having the disease usually do not experience almost any serious signs and symptoms at all.

  33. Marvis Bello
    Marvis Bello says:

    Hullo here, just got conscious of your wordpress bog through Bing, and realized that it’s really informational. I will take pleasure in if you decide to persist these.

Leave a Reply

Want to join the discussion?
Feel free to contribute!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.